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  • Confessions of an Instagrammer #10

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    What is it with people and New Year’s Days? We love to celebrate the new year so much that we do it twice a year. I don’t know. Maybe it’s the idea of hoping that something good, better or greater will come our way. Hoping that this year will open doors to a new exciting career in marketing, to start a dream cupcake business, have a new pet dog named Miley or as petty as finally winning the lottery (even just a few thousands, please). Hoping for things you’ve never done before and aspiring to write them into your future.

    Or it’s the feeling of unloading last year’s emotional baggage behind. Putting it in a black hole as if it never existed. Waking up and surprisingly feeling better. Lighter. Carefree. Not forgetting, because let’s face it, no one really forgets. But for some reason, the crying has stopped.

    It just feels so good. For the first time in a very long time, I’m happy. No specific reason. I just am.

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    Kung Hei Fat Choi! Wishing everyone a blessed new year! #yearofthegoat

  • Confessions of an Instagrammer #9

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    I cut ties with a boy who I’ve loved (and I still love) and now I’m dealing with the aftermath. Picking up the pieces of something not whole in the first place. It’s difficult. It hurts.

    If only Facebook could charge me for every visit to his wall. I spend hours staring and reading his posts. Looking for hints that he misses me. Reading each line as if they are intended for me. Like he is speaking to me. Like hey, I’m miserable without you. Like I’ve created a void in his life. A small or big void, I don’t care. I just want to know that he cares.

    I can cry everyday but nothing will be the same. Not the way he feels. Not the way I feel.

    I have nothing left to do but move forward. There are no wrong moves, I always say. Every choice is a path we ought to take.

    You take a step forward but stepping backward will not bring you back exactly where you started.

    Everything is irreversible, but the future is endless.

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    The waves won’t stop for you.

  • Think Before You Click: “Viral” Stories

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    Today I read a “viral” news from my Facebook newsfeed, recently picked up by ABS-CBN News (“VIRAL: Man walks away after woman trips on his bag”), about an incident in a local airport. For me, what happened was a mere lapse in judgement. The man decided not to help a woman in the accident he indirectly caused. It could generally be considered as rude but you can’t really call that “injustice.” The man should have went back, helped and apologized. On the other end, maybe he saw that airport staff were already helping the woman and out of embarrassment, he decided to leave.

    Well, that’s my opinion and I’m like every netizen crawling in the web waiting for the next news to arrive. Once it catches my attention regardless if I’ve seen/read the video/article, I would immediately repost it on my wall along with my unsolicited opinion.

    Think before you click. This is something that we Filipinos have been hearing for quite some time now. But really, do Filipino netizens think before they click? In this incident, viewers can only judge by the video, which by the way has no audio. Even if it does have audio, we are only seeing one angle to the whole story. Giving our own opinion without knowing the whole story is a dangerous affair. Moreover, we are irresponsibly putting these people in a public trial.

    I am not siding with anyone. I just want to emphasize that the internet is a very powerful tool. It can make or break someone’s reputation. Before sharing or posting something, we should consider how it affects others especially the people in the video.

    The internet is sadly becoming a venue for selfish rants and biased complaints (I’m also guilty and I’m not saying that this story is). It’s just disappointing that news sites have to pick up viral stories to stir the emotions and opinions of their readers. I read somewhere that, because of the internet, the demand for news has become 24/7 and naturally, quality is one of the obvious trade-offs.

    I can’t help but think if mainstreaming viral stories is a way for the media to distract netizens and the general public from the more pressing issues happening in the country.

    Just my thought. What are your thoughts on this matter?

  • Confessions of an Instagrammer #8

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    Most of the time, we don’t realize that we have changed until someone points it out. The ugly duckling did not discover that it grew into a beautiful swan until it saw itself on the water.

    Over two years ago, I felt that we were too close for our own good. I was in a terrible place then and he was the only one who listened. He made me happy. I guess I also made him… happy. At least, I hoped so.  It started innocent, yes, but change has its way of ruining things.

    I woke up one day and everything was different. His voice became my favorite song I longed to hear each day. His touch fed me warmth I had never felt for a very long time. His smile made me want to kiss him endlessly.

    I began loving him but he simply didn’t love me back.

    I wanted him to know but I was afraid to lose him. I never told anyone about my truth because I didn’t want it to be true. I even denied it to myself.

    We were friends and that’s the closest I could get. I tried holding on to it. I held on to our daily routine. That every four in the afternoon, he was mine.

    However, sometimes, change is just a decision people make. The beautiful swan could either decide to remain being alone or joyfully flock with the other swans.

    It’s a decision to say goodbye. Goodbye.

    Goodbyes are the worst. #EmbraceChange

  • Confessions of an Instagrammer #7

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    Maintaining a relationship is hard and even harder when you don’t know what that “relationship” is. I know we are more than friends, but I don’t know if he feels the same way. 

    I mean, we text.  Or more truthfully, I text him and he occasionally responds. This was a set up I was willing to live with. This routine made me happy. He made me happy. Perhaps, this was the love I thought I deserved (to quote one of the few books I finished) since this was the closest I could get to him.

    I know I deserve better but each time I try to cut him off, he does something that pulls my heart right back.

    Today, I want to let him go because it hurts. My heart hurts.

    I bought him a piece of his favorite dessert. I texted him and he didn’t respond. I waited in our spot. I called him and he didn’t answer. We were supposed to meet today for our daily afternoon snacks. Minutes passed and still nothing. Maybe it’s intentional that he was avoiding me. Maybe it’s his girlfriend saying that I need to back off.

    Maybe…nevermind.

    The ice cream is starting to melt.

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    Pistachio Ice-Cream Filled Macarons 🙂 #dessert #yummy