Moving on

  • Meeting new people can be both frightening and exciting.

    It’s scary to put myself out there pretending not to hear all their judgments or using a less harsh term, first impressions. To stand there in my best clothes, in my straightest stance. Smiling but not too wide. Just a smirk to show the dimple on my right cheek. Overthinking every word that comes out of my mouth, thinking each will make or break my chances of building a relationship I can finally call mine.

    Well, I always put my best foot forward in everything. Meeting new friends included. And even more if I like someone. I share every exciting detail of my life (and maybe exaggerate them a bit) just to keep that someone interested. Just to keep him asking questions. Just to keep the conversations going. Just to keep him wanting more for tomorrow. Wanting more from me.

    The idea of starting a blank page in a stranger’s life gives me the butterflies in my stomach. The beautiful glittery kind not the moth-looking ones. This gives me hope that this person will finally treat me right. The way I want to be treated. The way I’m ought to be treated. Thinking that this may have been the Cinderella moment I’ve been waiting for. The reward for being too kind.

    Just this time and just like every other time, I stand there thinking this may just actually work. Maybe, he’ll be the one. Otherswise, I’ll have to start all over again.

    Life is a cycle of trials and errors. You just have to keep trying until you get the right answer. #thoughts

  • What is it with people and New Year’s Days? We love to celebrate the new year so much that we do it twice a year. I don’t know. Maybe it’s the idea of hoping that something good, better or greater will come our way. Hoping that this year will open doors to a new exciting career in marketing, to start a dream cupcake business, have a new pet dog named Miley or as petty as finally winning the lottery (even just a few thousands, please). Hoping for things you’ve never done before and aspiring to write them into your future.

    Or it’s the feeling of unloading last year’s emotional baggage behind. Putting it in a black hole as if it never existed. Waking up and surprisingly feeling better. Lighter. Carefree. Not forgetting, because let’s face it, no one really forgets. But for some reason, the crying has stopped.

    It just feels so good. For the first time in a very long time, I’m happy. No specific reason. I just am.

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    Kung Hei Fat Choi! Wishing everyone a blessed new year! #yearofthegoat